Inability to marry

Q 2: I am a nineteen-year-old adolescent, who is haunted by thoughts of sex. I truly live in anxiety and have no interest in my studies, as I am always thinking about sex, and Satan, may Allah curse him, is tempting me to commit Zina (sexual intercourse outside marriage) - may Allah provide all of us with refuge from that. Bear in mind that I am not able to marry, because I am still in the secondary school. I try to be patient day after day, but I can no longer bear it. I hope you can help me and tell me what to do, as the only solution I can think of is to marry, but I can not afford it. Due to these circumstances, I have become very skinny and sometimes when I perform Salah (Prayer) I do not know what I have done or how many Rak‘ahs (units of Prayer) I have performed, because I am thinking about this matter. Please help me.

A: If your condition is as you have mentioned, perform as much voluntary Sawm (Fasting) as possible, as this will help you to control yourself, curb your desire, and to retain your chastity. (Part No. 18; Page No. 22) It is authentically reported that the Prophet (peace be upon him) said: “O young men! Those among you who have the ability for marriage, let them marry, as it is more able to lower the gaze (i.e., from looking at forbidden things) and guard the private parts (i.e., chastity, from illegal sexual acts); but those who cannot should observe Sawm (Fasting), for it will remove their sexual desire.” (Reported by Al-Bukhari and Muslim) If you can borrow the money to get married and have the ability to repay the debt later, you should do this to protect your chastity, and you should beg Allah’s Help in the realization of this. We advise you to avoid whatever may stimulate your desire, lower your gaze, and avoid mixing with women and sitting and talking to them as much as possible. I ask Allah (Exalted be He) to keep you chaste and protect you from lust and Fitnah (temptation). May Allah grant us success. May peace and blessings be upon our Prophet Muhammad, his family, and Companions.