What did `Aishah mean when she said: He used to kiss and fondle me?
Q: What did
(may Allah be pleased with her) mean when she said
he used to kiss and touch me
What is meant in detail by "touch me" that is mentioned in the Hadith? Please guide me. May Allah reward you with the best.
who observes Sawm (Fast) has the Rukhsah (concession) to kiss and touch without having intercourse as long as he is able to control his lust. It was authentically reported on the authority of
`Aishah (may Allah be pleased with her) that she said:
The Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) used to kiss and touch (his wives) without having intercourse while observing Sawm; but he had the greatest control over his desire (as compared with you).
Also, it was authentically reported on the authority of
`Amr ibn Abu Salamah (may Allah be pleased with him and his father) that he asked the Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him):
"Can a fasting person kiss (his wife)? The Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) said: "Ask her" -meaning
Um Salamah- and she told him that the Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) used to do that. Whereupon he said: "O Messenger of Allah, Allah pardoned you all your sins, the previous and the later ones. Upon this the Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) said: "By Allah, I am the most God-conscious among you and I fear Him most among you."
We have issued a detailed Fatwa (legal opinion issued by a qualified Muslim scholar) in this concern (Part No. 9; Page No. 161) that explains the ruling on kissing and touching by the person observing Sawm that reads as follows:Anyone who has desire and fears that he may release Maniy (sperm released on orgasm) if he kisses or touches without having sexual intercourse, it will be Haram (prohibited) for him to do that during Sawm. However, if anyone has desire and does not fear the release of Maniy but is unsure, it is Makruh (disliked) for him to kiss or engage in foreplay. This is because completing and protecting the validity of Sawm is an obligation while touching or kissing one's wife without having intercourse may invalidate the obligatory Sawm and so it is not permissible.Yet, if one is not stimulated by kissing because of his ability to control his desire, illness, or old age, he may then kiss and fondle his wife but without having intercourse. This is the case which
`Aishah (may Allah be pleased with her) referred to when she said:
The Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) used to kiss while observing Sawm; but he had the greatest control over his desire (as compared with you).
Muslim) As the Messenger (peace be upon him) had control over his desire and did not fear having intercourse or ejaculating, it was permissible for him to kiss and engage in foreplay. The same applies to those who can control their desire from the Ummah (nation based on one creed) when kissing and engaging in foreplay. It was related by
Abu Dawud on the authority of
Abu Hurayrah that a man asked the Prophet (peace be upon him) about kissing (his wife) while fasting.
He (Part No. 9; Page No. 162) (the Prophet) allowed him to do so. Another person came and asked him about kissing while fasting and he did not allow him to do that. The one whom the Prophet (peace be upon him) allowed was an old man while the one whom the Prophet (peace be upon him) did not allow was a youth.
Anyhow, if a person kisses and so on and does not ejaculate, his Sawm is valid, but if he releases Maniy, his Sawm is invalidated and he must take Janabah Ghusl (full ritual bath to cleanse of sexual discharge). On the other hand, if a person secretes Madhy (white viscid fluid secreted due to sexual thoughts or desire), his Sawm is not broken according to the correct scholarly opinion.May Allah grant us success. May peace and blessings be upon our Prophet Muhammad, his family, and Companions.