Q: I am a nineteen year old man. All praise be to Allah that my parents are well. They are still alive. I had led a happy life before I reached the age of puberty. When I reached the life stage known as adolescence, my life changed completely. It is a fact that I disobeyed Allah a lot by abandoning Salah (Prayer), not observing Sawm (Fast), breaching of faith and taking untruthful oaths. I forgot that there will be a day of recompense. Also, I was unkind to my parents and used to insult them. Satan led me to forget the Ayah (Qur'anic verse) in which Allah says about parents,
...say not to them a word of disrespect, nor shout at them but address them in terms of honour.
I write to you and want to turn to Allah in repentance to forgive me and be merciful to me. Also, I want to tell you that my parents (Part No. 24; Page No. 335) always speak well of my elder brother before people, while they speak ill of me. They always insult me and beat me before other people including my friends and enemies. They still adopt a traditional style of life. They have no intention of developing their way of dealing with me or to respect me. Now I am like an animal that no one shows deferential regard for. I tried to be kind to my parents, but I failed to do so. This is because my parents always insult me as I am the youngest member of the family. It is a fact that I cannot repay their favors upon me. I hope you can find a solution to my problem as quickly as possible.
A:
First:
We advise you
to turn to Allah in repentance by feeling regret for the sins you have committed, determining not to commit such sins again as well as doing many good deeds. This is because good deeds remove the evil ones. Allah (Exalted be He) says,
And verily, I am indeed forgiving to him who repents, believes (in My Oneness, and associates none in worship with Me) and does righteous good deeds, and then remains constant in doing them, (till his death).
He also says,
And those who invoke not any other ilâh (god) along with Allâh, nor kill such person as Allâh has forbidden, except for just cause, nor commit illegal sexual intercourse - and whoever does this shall receive the punishment.
The torment will be doubled to him on the Day of Resurrection, and he will abide therein in disgrace;
Except those who repent and believe (in Islâmic Monotheism), and do righteous deeds; for those, Allâh will change their sins into good deeds, and Allâh is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful.
(Part No. 24; Page No. 336) Second: We advise you
to be kind to your parents no matter how much they harm you. This is because being kind to them and obeying them results in their satisfaction and thus Allah's satisfaction. It is mentioned in a Prophetic Hadith,
He will please Allah he who pleases his parents; and he will suffer the anger of Allah whoever angers his parents.
It is worth mentioning that if you turn to Allah in repentance, follow the teachings of Islam, do good deeds and avoid evil acts, your parents and other people will definitely love you. Allah (Exalted be He) says,
Verily, those who believe [in the Oneness of Allâh and in His Messenger (Muhammad صلى الله عليه وسلم)] and work deeds of righteousness, the Most Gracious (Allâh) will bestow love for them (in the hearts of the believers).
May Allah guide us and you to have sincere repentance that may be a reason for gaining Allah's Pleasure and best reward as He is All-Hearing and Oft-Responsive!May Allah grant us success. May peace and blessings be upon our Prophet Muhammad, his family, and Companions.
Tawbah from lying
