Setting out conditions when vowing

Q: When our infant child was ill, my wife vowed that if he recovered she would take him to Makkah Al-Mukarramah to perform `Umrah with me (his father). She stipulated not to take any other member of the family. Is it permissible for me to take one of my elder sons to help me with driving, as our house is more than 400 kilometers away from Makkah. It should be mentioned that I have another wife that would like to accompany us, is it permissible to take her along? Would the vow be fulfilled if I take the child, his mother, and the whole family to `Umrah during Ramadan? This actually occurred last Ramadan 1418 A.H, and it was after the vow. Has the vow been fulfilled by this, or should I go another time with the wife who took the vow and the child only? Please answer my question in detail. (Part No. 23; Page No. 365) May Allah bless you!

A: The woman must perform the `Umrah as was vowed if she is able to do this, for the Prophet (peace be upon him) stated, Whoever vows to obey Allah should obey Him. As for the condition she stipulated to accompany her husband alone without the rest of the family, it is to be disregarded. If she had performed the `Umrah during Ramadan with the intention of fulfilling her vow, this would have sufficed. However, it should be noted that such vows should be avoided, for the Prophet (peace be upon him) stated, Do not take vows, for a vow has no affect on the Divine Decree; it is only to extract from the miser. (Agreed upon by Imams Al-Bukhari and Muslim). May Allah grant us success. May peace and blessings be upon our Prophet Muhammad, his family, and Companions.