Being dutiful to the mother by standing by her against his father although she misuses money
A woman misuses money by purchasing musical instruments and other things of the sort. Is it permissible for her elder educated children to (Part No. 25; Page No. 126) support her against their father, as they think that by doing so they are dutiful to her?
If the reality is as mentioned by the questioner, it is not permissible for her children to support her against their father. Rather, they must advise her and guide her to lead a blissful family life, obeying the father and taking good care of her children. The children also have to treat their parents kindly, fulfill their rights towards them as prescribed by Islam, co-operate with them in doing righteous and pious deeds, and avoid supporting them in sinful acts. Allah (Exalted be He) states:
And your Lord has decreed that you worship none but Him. And that you be dutiful to your parents.
And We have enjoined on man (to be dutiful and good) to his parents. His mother bore him in weakness and hardship upon weakness and hardship, and his weaning is in two years - give thanks to Me and to your parents. Unto Me is the final destination.
But if they (both) strive against you to make you join in worship with Me others that of which you have no knowledge, then obey them not; but behave with them in the world kindly, and follow the path of him who turns to Me in repentance and in obedience. Then to Me will be your return, and I shall tell you what you used to do.
May Allah grant us success. May peace and blessings be upon our Prophet Muhammad, his family, and Companions.